Pre-Med By the Numbers

I am 5 years further behind in my medical career, but I just thought I would try to see if I could compete with Shrodinger's Cat.

Years in school post-BA degree: 2.5
Number of years in formal post-bac pre-med program: 1.5
Number of grades less than an A I have recieved since: 1 (computer science)
Number of sugar free-red bulls: 157
Number of double-tall lowfat lattes: 201
Number of all nighters: 1
Number of hours studying: 3380
Number of model organic molecules I have constructed: 74
Number of boyfriends: 2
Number of ex-boyfriends: 2
Number of ex-boyfriends that work for the company that own this blogging site: 1
Number of ex-boyfriends who call themselves Shrodinger the Cat: 1
Number of times I have chosen a lab partner based on looks: 2
Number of times cute lab partner was married or had a girlfriend (one time his hand was broken, so he didn't have on his wedding band): 2
Number of times I've cursed the entire semester for having chosen lab partner based on looks and not academic ability: 1
Number of times a patient has bit me: 1
Number of times a patient has slapped me: 11 (usually 95 year old Asian ladies)
Number of times a patient has slapped me on the ass: 1
Number of times I was attracted to the patient that slapped me on the ass:0
Number of times I have been asked out by a pyschiatric patient who claimed to be getting out the next day: 3
Number of patients with my birthdate (not year): 2
Number of needles I have been stuck with by HIV positive patients: 1
Number of TB exposures: 1
Number of months I get to take INH because of TB exposure: 6
Number of times I have drawn my own blood: 2
Number of times I gave myself a giant hematoma from drawing my own blood: 1
Number of Episodes of Grey's Anatomy watched: 46 (yes, that's all of them)
Number of times I think I've contracted/have something that I've learned about in physiology: 7
Number of times I really had said disease/condition: 3
Number of male nurses who have flirted with me: 2
Number of doctors who have flirted with me: 1
Number of doctors who have tried to convince me not to go to medical school and go into investing instead: 2